The most interesting warning I've ever seen in the source code of a blog was at mybluehouse.com. It reads:

"If you're just peeking, peek away. But if you're planning on taking my weblog layout and/or images I assure you that I'll come across your site eventually and when I do, I'll make you feel the sharp pain of my foot kicking you in the behind. Then I'll make your life real hell for a while through a variety of ways. Promise."

Billy Reed
"Your lemon is bigger than mine", she said looking at the half slice of lemon perched on the rim of my tall lemonade glass.
"You can have mine if you want". I had no need for the sour friut. In my head I thought, penis envy but what came out my mouth was "lemon envy". I scrunched my face when she bit into and sucked on the bitter slice. I could almost taste it in my mouth.

In the background bar/restaurant, N-Touch, a melodiously classy smooth jazz band turned notes into soothing hypnotic music as the crowd swayed to the beat. I turned my attention back to her. She seems to be having a good time. She's talking about when she got knocked in the crotch by a hockey puck. Again I scrunch my face but it quickly turns into a smile and then a histerical laugh as I listen to her. I've never met anyone who's gone through such intense agony and has such sense of humor about it.

The music was great, the food was good too, all eighteen baby back ribs. The evening went well. We walk back to the car in the rain, tired, full and content.

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"My brain is writting checks my body can't cash."

"If your phone doesn't ring, you'll know it's me."

"Does the noise in my head bother you."

"Is that your face or did your neck throw up?"

"Remember, it's not what you look like, it's who you are."

-from Dan Millers book "Living, Laughing and Loving Life"

"I'm gonna treat you like a queen."
What exactly does that mean? How often do spouses and significant others pamper thier mates like kings or queens?
I don't want to be treated like a queen and I sure as heck am not going to treat my man like a king. I will treat him like the man that I love, my best friend and the one who will always be there for him. I want a man who will have time for me. Not a king with the problems of the entire nation on his shoulders. How often does a king make dinner for his hardworking queen? When a king presents his queen with a gift it doesn't have the same effect as when your poor hardworking sweetheart gives you a gift. I would not want my mate to play the servant role either. A servant worships his queen, not by choice but because he has to. I want my man to love me by choice. I want him to feel free to speak his mind. Love me like an equal, not as his superior. I don't see anything glamorous about being treated like a queen.

I was looking through a magazine today and noticed how all the people in there seemed so perfect. Perfectly flawless skin, perfectly figured, ever last one of them. And it makes me wonder, is that what the young generation strive to look like? No wonder there are so many depressed teens out there. Why can't we encourage them to love the way they look. We'll never think ourselves as perfect but why strive to be something we'll never be?
Bubu and I were looking for Maya Angelou's poem "Phenomenal Woman" and guess what. We found it. What a beautiful poem. I dedicate it to all the women out there.

"Phenomenal Woman"
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Can't get the song out of my head...

It's just those rainy days
Spend a lifetime tryin to wash away
Until the sun come out and shines again
Smile for me, smile for me

All of those rainy days
Spend ya lifetime tryin to wash away
Until the sun shines and I see your face
Smile at me, smile at me

Taste of Beaverton
Soulsis, her friend and I went to The Taste of Beaverton Festival at Griffith Park. It was pretty interesting. There was so much to see and do. Several companies were displaying things in boothes and giving away free stuff. We went mainly for two things, the food and to watch Spirogyra perform. The band worked magic on stage. I had no idea how good they really were.
The weather started getting cold (at least for me) so I bought a long sleeved hawaiin t-shirt. Who knew there was such a thing. Can you believe they had alcohol patrol? Yep, they had people in tight uniform walking around checking out for drunks. I guess the cops were too busy looking out for litter bugs.

What advice do you give to your friend who's going cross country? Don't go? Try and stay awake? Watch out for roadkill? Is it a bad idea to have them call you every couple of hours just to see if they're ok or is that overkill?

Sometimes you get forwards in your inbox that you just want to share..

Beauty of a Woman
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears,
The figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows.
The beauty of a woman
With passing years -- only grows.

Hospital Edzeban
Hospital food is suposed to suck, right? I had some good; chicken pasta alfredo from the hospital cafeteria. It was made in front of you by a cheif, and it was good! It had peas in the pasta, the chicken tasted great. It even had a gourmet style look. And the caf was packed. I guess it was lunch time and most people would rather eat there than bring their own food. It was very affordable too. I wonder if we would just walk off the street into that hospital cafeteria and have lunch.

They even had these minty flavored toothpick. Before then, I'd never had minty flavored toothpicks. Who invented such a thing anyway? They totally shocked my taste buds. There I was thinking I was imagining it so I asked Soulsis to try it. The woman called me a villager. I'm sorry if little things like that amaze, puzzle, amuse me.
Maybe I'm the only one who thinks hospital food tastes good. Maybe that's because (as some people think) I'm a villager.

Poor Nurse
I had the poor nurses panties in a twist. Not literally. I was sitting in the lounge area and she came up to me and asked who I was waiting for. Normally I would have been upset but I did see her asking everyone else. Sometimes I wonder why I do such things. I told her that I was waiting for Emitt, Emitt Smith. I got that name from some commercial I had seen. She checked her list and saw no Emitt Smith. I seemed rather upset. I told her that Emitt had come in earlier that morning and I had been waiting for hours. She said she'd walk around the wards and check.
An hour later she was back looking confused. I told her that I'd seen the doctor or nurse take him upstairs. She suddenly looked worried. How would it look? The hospital had lost a patient. Emitt Smith was gone. Could he have just walked out the hospital? I gave her that "Oh no you didn't" look. I asked to talk to someone in charge. I knew it was going too far. Luckily my ride had just called so I stormed out of the hospital yelling back to the nurse, "I'll be back!"

Love Help and Happiness is out there

Did you know that there are sites out there that actually help you if you want to write a love letter? There are so many love sites out there it's amazing. So if you ever need any help...
* The Cyrano Server
* The Hugging Site
* Loving You
* Love and Sex
* One and Only
* Dear Delilah
* Tantra
* My Dear Diary
* History of Sex
* Secret Admirer
* Romance 101
* Redbook Marriage and Sex
* Love Police

and the list goes on and on and...

Around the park..
Soulsis and I went for a walk in the park the other day. It was a warm evening and after a nice relaxing nap we finally pulled ourselves out of bed and left goofy to guard the house.
There was a middle aged looking man walking his dogs by the road. Further up the hill we saw another middle aged man with the same distinct features as the one we just saw. Makes you wonder. A deja vu? Maybe it's a glitch in the Matrix. That reminds me. Soul sis has all and I mean ALL my favorite movies and she hasn't even watched half of them. Why did she get them then? I don't think she knows, but I do.
I sat on the swings for a while. Something we both haven't done in a long time. It didn't make me feel like a kid again but that's ok. At this point in my life, I don't think I do.

Look what I found...

Someone thinks I'm worthy. If you like what you see vote for me!

It feels good to know that there are people out there who read my blog everyday. Wow! I have loyal readers. I feel like an online personality. I have to give thanks to y'all. Even negative viewers like Isaac who seem to know all about me just be reading my blogs. If people didn't read my blog, well, I'd still post but it feels good to know that someone out there is following my life, as odd as it may be.

To thine own self be true..
I've come to realise that it really doesn't matter what people think. At the end of the day you have to be true to yourself otherwise you're only going to end up miserable. And who'll be to blame but yourself? Soemtimes we do things just to please others and we get so used to being in that state that we don't realise that it doesn't make us happy.
Then again, humans are social creatures. So unless you live the life of a hermit you have to try and fit in somehow or face being treated as an outcast. Wait a minute, doesn't that contradict my original statement? Oh Lord, my brain is fried. I'm being forced to blog by certain readers like bubbles. Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is that don't go overboard trying to fit into societal norms if it doesn't make you happy? If you can make sense out of this gibberish, please explain it to me.

Did I read this right? Pussy Issues? Tell me my eyes are not playing tricks on me. I hope that's a cat Bubble butt is talking about and not her....

Making Waist Beads
We've been making waist beads. Soul sis and I went to a crafts store and found a whole bunch of colors. She brought up the idea of red gold and green waist beads. It sounded like a great idea but I didn't think it would match my skin color so I settled for the blues. I think they turned out pretty well. Some day soon I'll make the red gold green waist beads. We currently have about 8 meters of beadwork combined. Maybe it's about time we stopped and tried them on.

Having a nine to five job is not an easy task. Especially when you're in the office and have nothing to do between tasks. Time seems to slip by so slowly when you have nothing to do and speeds up when you're having fun. I wonder why that is? What in the brain gives us such an extorted view of time. Also notice that when you enjoy what you're doing, time speeds up but when you don't, it might as well stand still.

Light Soup Dilema
Why is it that when you want to do something right it turns out sloppy? Don't you hate it when your light soup turns into stew? I know how to make light soup. I know I know how to make light soup. I know how to make it my way, the only way I know how. Steam meat with salt, onions, fresh tomatoes and pepper. Ginger optional. Blend veggies when ready. Pour it it back in with the meat, add tomatoe sauce or paste, add water and let cook. That's the only way I know how. This is my dilema, there are no fresh tomatoes. What do I do? I panic. I know we've got chopped tomatoes but I have no idea what to do with it. Is that sad or what? I have to 411 my friend just to find out. I'm not suprised they call me a "krasini with a degree".

A day at the zoo.
Some days you just don't feel like doing anything. That's how it started till we were rudely ushered out of bed by annoying phone calls. It was a nice day to be at the zoo. We saw all sorts of interesting animals but they all seemed to be depressed. There were the asian elephants, varieties of monkeys, cats, goats, birds, wolves, giraffs etc.

The tropical African room felt so much like home to me. The humidity was heavenly. To my friend, it must have felt like hell. I don't know how anyone with asthma could ever survive in Ghana. I'm not sure there are many asthmatics in Ghana. How would they deal with the humidity of the rainy season or the dryness of the hamattan?

The bats were a hoot. All I know about them is that the rest upside down. It never occured to me that they'd have to pee and poop right side up. One mischevious little bat peed in one of the food pans and flew to the other end of the cage to rest. I'm sure he had a grin on his face.

The tigers were awesome. When they awoke, I realised why I love those creatures so much. There's just something so majestic about them. Somehow despite how good they looked they seemed so tired and depressed. These animals need their exercise. They need to be the wild animals that they are. Cages can be so limiting. The leopards were not much better. I could have sworn that one in particular had obsessive compulsive disorder. It kept pacing back and forth in the same crestlike motion, never looking up or around at its audience. I guess it just didn't care anymore.

Even the monkeys seemed depressed. They stared with empty eyes. They must be dreaming of freedom, if they even know what that is. A baby monkey stuck to it's mothers tit while she checked him for tics. A beautiful mother and child moment. The birds were pretty cool too but even they didn't seem to have the aliveness of animals in the wild. I guess that's why it's a zoo.

Despite the depressive atmosphere, it was a nice warm day to spend with someone special. I think my favorite part was sitting on the bench watching people walk by. It seemed so relaxing as if we hadn't a care in the world. Well, maybe one. We were looking for someone to take our picture.

ErotiCAT
My friend has an adorably annoying neurotic cat called Goofy who responds to cat or animal. He's absolutely the cutest smokey-black cat ever. The goofball is so full of energy, he'd chase his shadow and chew it of he could. He loves chasing after invisible objects and eats everything including paper, plastic and human hair. He likes his privacy when he's in the litterbox. He purrs when he wants attention and sleeps in the oddest places. His favorites, where ever your head should be, in the book you're trying to read and by the computer. I swear that cat is schitzo.

Goofy has the strangest habit late at night and into the early morning. Grooming and licking you as if you were his dirty little kitten. He parts your hair with his sharp claws and paws and slobbers all over your scalp licking it and wetting your hair. He makes the weirdest sound as he does it. It's almost as if he's enjoying himself. I guess as a cat with no balls, he's got to find a way to satisfy himself.

The neurotic creature will lick the back of your neck and ears. He doesn't seem to mind being pushed away, he'll be back in 5 seconds. It doesn't matter how hard you try to keep the covers over your head, he'll dig his way through them. The scary thing is that if you didn't know it were the cat with his sandpaper like tongue, you'd swear someone was trying to turn you on. Did I say it was a turn on? I plead the fifth. All I can say is that I now know the cat lady's secret!

On the 24th of May I went to a graduation. I have never been to a more boring ceremony in my entire life. There was no music besides the ordinary graduation music. There was no dancing. The students didn't seem excited. If anything they were in a hurry to leave. I felt sory for those who recieved an empty tube (no diploma inside). The host went on and on about September 11th and how life has changed after that. That must have been the most depressing graduation service ever. It would have been more eventful if it had rained.
After the ceremony, we had our own little celebration which was far more interesting. Ghanaians do not mess around with thier partying. There was music, plenty of food, dancing, noise and someone making a fool of themselves. After the ceremony, there were more partying till the next day. Now that's how Ghanaians celebrate and event, any event. Funeral, birth, whatever, there's always a joyful ring to it, a concept I wish were practiced everywhere.

Baby Blues
On the 16th of May, I met the most gorgeous baby ever. His name is Julius. Such a happy baby too which is pretty rare. The 3 month of baby hardly ever cries. He loves to play and he loves to laugh and all he needs to fall asleep is his pacifier and his stuffed toy. Any mother would be lucky to have such a kid. In parks and at the mall, this baby gets so much attention, it's amazing. He's a chick magnet and a guy magnet too. This baby has no idea how many hearts he's going to break in future.

He makes me wish I were a kid again. I miss those care-free days when the most important agenda of the day was deciding which toys to play with. Julius' smile is enough to melt any heart. It starts from one corner of his mouth and ends with him showing off his toothless mouth. His eyes squint and sometimes he laughs so hard tears run down his face. I'm going to miss that little boy, his little feet, his little fingers and his beautiful smile.

I've realised that even though I don't want to have any children of my own, I however do want to be surrounded by them. I've never had anything against adoption and I plan to adopt as many as possible. Now, finding a man who doesn't want kids of his own yet is willing to put up with a bunch of mentally disturbed kids of others is the hard part.

DotFaf.... I'm back at it again!!

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Low
Narcissistic:	Low
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

Can it be possible that I really don't know how to show affection? I feel sorry for my kids if I ever have any.
You know what I've realised? No matter how gorgeous you are if you don't feel good about yourself, it doesn't matter. I wish everyone understood that.

Feels like an episode of The Twilight Zone
Ever realised how different it is knowing someone online and knowing them in person. There is usaully such a major difference. So major that is can change your entire view, your entire relationship with the person. There's this friend I originally met online, she seems so wild crazy and untamable but in person, she's the coolest calmest person I've ever met. So ordinary, so grounded (in some ways), so like myself. I feel so shy around her in person. I can't spew out my thoughts as I would do online.
And have you ever met someone who seems to be a duplicate of you? Someone with your tastes in almost everything. Someone who you feel you could exchange bodies with and feel comfortable in thier skin? Freaks me out but it's possible. I could be this person and no one would ever know. If this person is almost exactly like me then I have to say, I really like myself. I'm not all together stable but if I'm as cool as she is, I should be a very happy person.
And have you ever met someone you wish you could reach out to yet you're not sure how? In your head it all seems so easy. The emotions, words everything is lined up perfectly but nothing comes out of your mouth with you need it to? It's just so frustrating. Besides, what are the limits. What are the does and don'ts in person vrs the does and don'ts online. Are there any and if so, are they any different? Maybe the writers of The TwiLight Zone can help me out on this one.

Oh, what can I say. It's been a real adventure for this Ghanaian girl seeking enlightenment. I wish I could tell you everything I've been up to but that would take forever. I thought that after this experience I'd be ready to settle down into a normal life but it's just reassured me that, that's defiantely not what I want to do. Or is it? I'm still not too sure.
On May 15th when I started my little trip, I didn't know what to expect. All I knew was that I was in for something different. Well, when the bus broke down just out of town it kinda put a damper on the beginning of my trip. When I got to Ohio, I made the worst mistake. I forgot to check for my luggage. So by the time I got to my next destination I wasn't too suprised to find out that they hadn't arrived yet. I didn't mind too much that I didn't have anything to wear besides my one change of clothes. It bugged the heck out of me that my ablum was in one of those bags. Pictures are priceless and no matter how much they offer to replace them for, I'd rather have them back than any amount of money. Yep, that was my first lesson. Clothes $200, gifts $200, album $20, pictures PRICELESS!